Sunday, June 12, 2011

The End or Maybe Just the Beginning...

This last week, I finished the Celebrate Recovery 12 step program that I started back in August...but now that I have reached the end I realize that it is just the beginning!  The end of a chapter in my life, but the beginning of a whole new one...the end of a time of fellowship with my step-sisters, but the beginning of new relationships as I follow God's call to "carry this message to others"...the end of learning about new principles, but the beginning of "practicing these principles in all my affairs."  This truly is the beginning of a life-long journey towards hope and healing for me, one that will never end this side of heaven...

Paul's words echo through my mind..."not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 3:12-14

During our last stepstudy session together, our group of 'step-sisters' shared a special time of celebration...bittersweet.  Rejoicing in our achievements and yet grieving the end of our 'group'...

We had some creative
ladies in our group!
Celebrate Recovery this last Friday night was another celebration as three different step-study groups 'graduated'.  I chose to share my story through a 'cardboard testimony'.  Others chose to have a quote on the big screen, but I thought I'd challenge my fear of being up front a little and do the 'risky' thing...of course, I didn't know they'd choose me to be the first in line or I might have chickened out!  lol 

They did give me cues as to when to lead out the group and when to go up, but then I had to focus on not tripping going up the steps, the count on the first side, the blank/serious look, the flip, not getting the second side upside-down, the count on the second side, the joyful look of healing, panning the board so all could see, moving off get the picture, pretty challenging for someone with anxiety issues! 

But I did it and I didn't trip or fall and I'm glad I chose the cardboard testimony because when I flipped that board and saw the looks of joyful celebration and hope it was all worth itIt has all been worth it.  Thank you, Jesus! 

I could have added...grief, anger, control issues,
codependency, food issues, anxiety,
childhood sexual wonder I felt hopeless!

God's love and grace have set me free...not
that I have 'arrived', by any means, but I have my
heart set on pilgrimage...Psalm 84:5-7.


Unknown said...

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Terri :o) said...

The road is never ending, but so worth the trip! So glad you were able to stay here long enough to complete your step study! You have grown and healed so much. I believe God has great things in store for you!!!

Laura said...

Thanks for posting this - awesome and inspirational. I have been catching up on blogs/blogging lately, and this really spoke to me - you are so great - thanks for being so real and open!

Melissa G said...

Wow, praise God! What a testimony! Thanks for sharing!